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R E S O U R C E S

Dana - Generosity

strings attached

Generosity can be developed at many levels and its value as a transformative practice can not be underestimated. It can be contemplated as a simile of the third Noble Truth - non-desire, freedom from attachment, letting go. It acts as a balance to greed and selfishness.
• When we give, how easy it is to part with the things that we don't really want or need. Those things that we are attached to are not so easy to give. Giving is literally a practice in letting go. But often we don't really let go - sometimes we attach a subtle net of 'strings'; our giving is conditional.
• Our society seems to function mostly through an acquisitive mode - how much junk have you got hoarded away, stashed in cupboards, under stairs, in boxes in the attic? When was the last time you gave a whole bunch away? The irony is that in an affluent society so many people have so much they don't need but don't give it away. In poorer societies people have much less but seem to share or give away more stuff. There are of course many exceptions, and you may well be one, but the consumer society is fueled on greed - and we do want the new, the interesting, the pleasant - and the old becomes the not interesting, which is the unpleasant. Practice giving. Practice being content with little.

take as long as you wish

Giving is usually associated with material things and it is probably the easiest place to start. Just try giving things - perhaps to friends as a beginning. The important thing with giving is the intention that motivates the act. If it is sincere then you can give almost anything and the object becomes entirely secondary, almost unimportant. It is a bit of a ciche but it is truely the thought that counts.
• give them a sweet • an article from the newspaper they might be interested in (unless you have - wisely - given newspapers up) • a bunch of wild flowers - or some vegetables or flowers from your garden • a smile • a greeting • share your recent photos • share your lunch • a bunch of grapes • a card • a note of thanks. This list could be endless but creating your own list is more developing an attitude rather than collecting a bag of stuff you carry round to give away. Ones' wordly possesions are then ideally viewed not with fear and concern of loss but with the thought 'who can I give this to?' There are obvious limitations. If you give all your stuff away - as I was once tempted to do in India in the face of so much poverty - you will be destitute.

time together

blessed offerings

Giving gifts can unfortunately be equation based - 'Aunt Mary gave me that for my birthday how could I possibly only give her this old thing?' and we are shamed into spending more. Material gifts are also generally perceived as purchased - time again, who has enough of it to make things? Or who can be bothered?
• The greatest gift you can give to another person is your time. For parents to spend time with their kids - and kids their parents. To sit with someone when they are unwell - even if there is nothing to say, just being with them, sharing your life with them. The archetypal picture of lovers - those who love each other - just sitting looking at each other, content with each others presence. Time is too often translated as money and that I spend my time making money and then give you lots of money is not the same as giving you the time direct.
• It is important to experience generosity as a two way exchange - giving and receiving.
• In a monastic environment there are regular opportunities for practising generosity. The main one being the daily midday meal which is offered by the lay people to the monks and nuns. It has taken me a while to find comfort around the art of receiving and it has been something learned. As a monk I am generally on the recieving end (as regards the material exchange) and my earlier responses were often confused. Partly feelings of unworthiness, partly being unable to respond in like kind and partly my pragmatic nature ('I don't need this thing you are giving me.'). What I developed as a reference point was the joy of generosity. To think that the donor had thought of me, organised something to offer, come to where I was, sought me out and then given me a gift. This takes a degree of care. Honour it.
In terms of worthiness I found it painful and useless getting caught in guilt. Much better to use the thought as a spur to consider 'what efforts am I making in my life towards worthiness?' There is a set of ten reflections we use in the monastery [see RESOURCES] and one of them fits here:
    "The days and nights are relentlessly passing, how well am I spending my time?"

Two quotes from the Pali scriptures: [see also: RESOURCES - Generosity Story]