|
|
A Monastery at home:
Using the monastery as a reference point presumes it to be the ideal
model. It is by no means perfect but it contains a wide range of historically
tested elements - many of which are echoed in other religious traditions.
It provides a starting point where you can look for ideas on how to
live a holy life - a good life. What you choose will vary according
to your disposition and personal situation but it is important to
appreciate that it is possible to structure any conditions
so as to make them more conducive to developing mindfulness and other
spiritual qualities.
Attitude:
• In relation to the
Eightfold Path setting up the correct attitude is Right Thought or
intention - which influences Right speech, action and livelihood.
This comes in regard to an appreciation that there is a 'problem'
and that one wants to change. There needs to be a very clear - or
as clear as one can - determination
to do something, to make change in one's life, otherwise efforts will
more than likely not be sustainable. Seeing craving, the cause of
the suffering, as a synonym for addiction, the approach of Alcoholics
Anonymous is a good reflection; their first step requires the alcoholic
to stand up and make a public statement: 'I am an alcoholic and I
need help'. This is not to suggest you need go this far but unless
your difficulties, anxiety, fear, suffering, etc. is seen in the light
of craving this particular approach to the conundrum of life will
have limited use.
• Having seen clearly
that things are less than perfect and made a determination the second
foundational attitude is compassion.
It is so often the way that on seeing a problem there is a tendency
to grab it and sort it out - or just annihilate it. Modern views on
efficiency and being practical, sensible, capable, etc can create
a demand on one to measure up to the incredibly high standard that
is the ideal human being. Who could ever be that? This is the
danger with ideals. Develop the compassion to allow yourself to be
just as you are - right now, in this present moment. This is not license
to condone bad habits but to be tolerant of the current reality; and
then, through one's determination, things will change.
• Knowing that things
will change, and having made an effort, the next hitch is the expectation
that things will change according to my expectations. Most likely
they won't, so the next attitude to cultivate is patience.
Allow that when you plant a seed in the ground it needs watering.
It needs a little sunlight. It needs time. It will grow according
to the ways of nature and also according to the conditions it has
to grow in.
|
WHOLE
HOLE
|
Environment:
Making changes to the conditions in which one lives is very important
although not always easy. The cycle that often gets set up is that
one has to do all sorts of things: work, travel, cook, study, go to
meetings, etc, etc, blah blah blah; just to keep life paid for. Often
these thing don't produce pleasant feeling; quite the opposite in
many instances. So, when there is a space - when you aren't compelled
to do stuff - the inclination is toward something that will produce
pleasant feeling. This is not unreasonable. However the kind of things
that get chosen are not always so skilful and often pleasant feeling
is taken as an easily accessible substitute for true freedom from
suffering - the quick fix. Again, not totally unreasonable but if
there is not any ability to be content with empty space or be content
with things they way they are, then life can become a kind of boom-bust
affair. Resenting the unpleasant and craving the pleasant - an unrelenting
tug of war, and the term is meant literally. How often we go to war
with the world and ourselves demanding 'what we want'. It is not reasonable
to expect to bin wanting - just like that - but when we do have choice
as to what we pick up or invite into our lives . . .
Structuring space: simplify - simplify - simplify
Step one: bin the TV.
Step two: get a stick and a ball and go outside.
I'm (sort of) joking but some changes usually need to be made. You
are what you eat and we eat things with all our senses. We consume
sights and sounds. Healthy diet = healthy life.
• Build a shrine [see
ART - WORSHIP]. Put things on it that connect
you with your idea of peace and contentment, with holiness, patience,
calm - and all that stuff. Anything can go on - pictures (of teachers,
family, cats), bobbles, toys, things from nature. Put such things
any old place - on top of your PC monitor (unless you binned it with
the TV), on the dash board of the car, at the end of the bath! The
winkle here is that your life ends up looking like an Indian truck
drivers cab - complex - back to where we started! What does it take
to keep us in a state of remembrance?
|
ALONE
|
•
Spend time alone in nature. Even if the weather is not ideal, go for
a walk.
• Be alone.
• Be silent.
• Write
a list of all the good things about yourself. 'That only takes a second'
did you say? Not so. Write down really simple, ordinary things: gave
a friendly greeting; didn't kick the cat; meditated once this week;
etc. etc. All these things are positive and have value. Put them
on your shrine.
• Chanting - singing is
similar but chanting is simpler and traditional chants or mantras have
stronger symbolic connections.
• Don't buy newspapers
or magazines - unless you really need to know. They are mostly
full of mindless rubbish; either shock, horror or pseudo pleasant feelings.
If you must read then be selective.
• Switch the radio off
if you are not specifically listening to it. Otherwise it is just space
wallpaper that bridges the little gaps in what you are actually doing.
Just be with that thing, with washing the dishes, with reading, with
just sitting.
• Meet with other people
who share your aspiration. This is of such great value. [see KALYANAMITTA]
• Visit churches. Never
mind if they are not Buddhist or you don't like the imagery - they are
quiet and spacious. Just sit there with your eyes closed and breathe.
In and out.
• Study a flower and then
draw or paint it. Even if you can't draw you can give such a thing your
attention. I find that writing all this stuff really brings focus to
my own practice; not just a casual glance but real attention.
• Make a list of useful
things for lay practioners to do and send it to me - this will bring
focus to your own practice. |
